If you can’t sing, I’ll tell you.
If you need to get some exercise, I’ll tell you.
If your talents don’t exactly extend to macrame, I’ll tell you.
If you’re not good at basketball, I’ll tell you.
If your iambic hexameter sucks, I’ll tell you.
Sally, Susan, and Spot, I’m not gonna lie to you. I may think you’re the bee’s knees and the cat’s pajamas and that your poop doesn’t stink (well, I KNOW that it does), but even if I think you’re the best thing since sliced bread and bottled Mountain Dew, I’m not gonna contribute to the sort of self-delusion that would lead you to make an absolute fool of yourself on a show like American Idol.
I’m sorry, and, YOU’RE WELCOME.


Good on you Jane!
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My husband and I made that promise to each other last night. Those will not be our children.
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But it makes for awesome entertainment. So I say let’s perpetuate the lies for our own enjoyment.
Although someone really needs to tell Paula that her hair is straight out of the 80′s. Kind of like her talent.
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BUT, you DID watch last night, hmmm? What is UP with that Osmond guy… seriously? he needs AI to break into the biz? That just ain’t right.
My daughter announced a few years back that when she turns 16 (in 3.5 yrs), she wants to try out. I said ok, if that’s what you want, then you’re gonna have to work hard to get ready, including private voice lessons, learn to play piano and guitar, music writing lessons, summer camps, and more. Then I asked her which of her current activities she wants to give up – soccer, basketball, summer camp, church choir, friends? So far, she’s not pushed at all on any of the “AI music stuff.”
Rather than saying NO to AI, I simply tried to make PREPARING for it sound as horrible as possible. So that she can keep the dream alive. Just like my mom let me believe that I could one day become Miss America. I’ve probably completely screwed up her adult self-image for life!
We do have fun watching it though!
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You said it Girl! I teach voice lessons to a young girl that wants to be on American Idol someday. Ai yai yai!
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Amen sistah. Why does everyone want to be a rock star? Why does everyone think they can sing? The world needs burger flippers too, and most of them are aspiring rock stars…
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No one could have said it better!
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hahahahaha
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Thank you, Thank you!! It truly amazes me that parents actually believe their children are good and ENCOURAGE them to try out!! YIKES!! They certainly entertain our household.
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I also feel that while this is good parenting, it is also good friendship.
Some of these people…wow.
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Bwaaahaaahaaa!
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