I was laughing by the time I finished this last email, so I thought I’d preserve it for posterity (hey, regardless of what else happens, we already have three of those).
Dick: Do you want to hold a garage sale this Saturday to try to sell our furniture that way?
Jane:
we’d get even less that way, that is if we could get people even to come to our neighborhood to buy stuff. you mean so we could do the shipping method after all? what? Dick: Look at the timestamp of my original message – I sent this before we decided to cancel the auto-shipping.
Jane: oh, sorry
Dick: You’re impossible.
Jane: well, unfortunately, none of “moving,” “new job,” “relocating to boondocks, usa,” or “possibly foreclosing on our nice little house in the crime-infested ghetto of south saint pete” begins with A, so they’re not covered by Dr. Laura’s 3 A’s that justify divorce. So I guess you’re stuck with me.
Actually, considering the stress level, we’re pretty ding-dang (to steal a phrase from June Cutoff-Cash) civil. I don’t trust those smiley faces though: they can cover a multitude of covert nasty feelings.
Ding-dang (what would be the form of this for a regular expletive rather than an adjective?), I feel so much better now. Cheerful, almost. Could be the second Mountain Dew I am drinking (this one chilled) or the three Ibuprofens I guzzled with a gallon of water. Or maybe it is just the restorative properties of blogging.
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Maybe “dingity-dangity”?
What are Dr. Laura’s three As? I assume adultry, abuse and…alcohol? Oh! Addiction?
thanks June, although dingity-dangity seems a bit unwieldy.
you’ve got the three A’s (although I’d add apathy — not personally, but as a justifiable reason).
read an interesting article on marriage today. when you do have a good marriage, who on earth do you have to thank for such a miraculous thing?