What do higher IQ’s after age 12 and being twice as likely to still be a virgin at age 21 have in common? Apparently, birth order. Being the firstborn, to be precise. The average difference in IQ is 3 points (4.5 between first and third children), and seems to hold when all other factors (parent’s education, income, gender, etc) are accounted for. In cases where the oldest child dies, the next oldest obtains the higher IQ; sounds sort of mess of potage, doesn’t it?
The virginity thing is interesting too. Dick Cavett (former gag writer for Johnny Carson, among other great things) wrote a column asking if it were possible for anyone today to graduate from high school as a virgin. I can’t tell you how much I hope and believe this is possible; homeschooling just looks better and better — a bomb shelter in the woods starts to look not-so-crazy-militia-whacko. According to David Brooks (second link, first paragraph), one possible reason could be that later-born children are exposed to more risqué stuff younger that the first-borns where sheltered from longer.
Brooks also thinks that you can’t teach sexual morality: you have to get kids somehow to live it; they have to feel loved and secure and be getting what they need, basically, from their parents so they don’t look for it in other places. He doesn’t come out and say that your example and expectations are the number one factors, but that’s what I think.
Dick wanted to know if this convergence of trivia was meant to indicate that being smarter is linked with being virginal. Actually, it’s just coincidence that these three articles were in today’s newspaper.
I’m the firstborn of five. If you know my siblings, you’re probably thinking, wow, imagine how smart Jane must be. At the birth of each of our children, Dick has looked anxiously at their hands, hoping they haven’t inherited the unbroken crease on my palm (a sign of Downs Syndrome). Dick used to tease me with, “Just think how smart you would be if you didn’t have Downs Syndrome.” Of course, counting all the brain cells I’ve lost in pregnancy, it’s only fair that I was also the firstborn.
Alas, I was not still a virgin at 21. I only made it to 20 years, 11 months and 29 days. But, as you might guess from posts last week, I got married exactly two days before my twenty-first birthday. I wonder if that counts?
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Shannon,
Not only am I the oldest of 7 children, and I didn’t get married until I was 28, but I also don’t have an unbroken crease in my palm. I guess that means I am a lot smarter than you. Just kidding! On a side note, NPR had a segment about IQ on Thursday and the basic idea was that IQ does not actually measure your intelligence, but rather how much you know, or your knowledge, which is not inherent. You know, I have never had my IQ tested. I probably never will so that way I can just assume that it is really, really high. Can’t wait to see you this summer. Maybe we can play Trivial Pursuit in order to see who is smarter.
Melinda
Shannon, you’ll have to read my blog from yesterday, the study that showed the oldest child is smarter was hogwash. It only studied men, only Norwegians, only a certain age. A nineteen year old Norwegian male in 1975 was certainly going to have a higher IQ than his 14 year old little brother. They did not conduct the study in a scientifically accurate way. Also the intelligence of men and women can not be measured in the same way. This study is getting so much play too, and it’s meaningless!
I graduated from high school a virgin, if that helps you out any. I do believe it’s still possible, but there’s no way my kids are ever going anywhere near a public school.
Well, if it’s true then I am pretty dumb. I was the fifth of eleven. I’m pretty sure some of my younger siblings are smarter than me…
Virginity for me was a very easy standard to maintain. Through public school and all. So I guess I’ll just try to raise my kids as Mom and Dad raised me and do a lot of praying.
“Of course, counting all the brain cells I’ve lost in pregnancy, it’s only fair that I was also the firstborn.” Um, I’ve had the same number of pregnancies minus 2 months….
What generalizations about oldest children are the most true? One I can think of is that parents are hardest (most demanding) on their firstborn. Don’t you think so? Parents mellow with each succeeding/successive (what’s the word) child?
I also didn’t find it exceedingly difficult to remain a virgin, even though most of my friends were having sex while we were in high school.
I have always been glad that I waited as long as I did, although, Harry, well, that’s another story!
Melinda — “trivial pursuit” hah! talk about knowledge rather than inherent ability (and what’s with all the sports questions?). the true test of wit is, as everyone knows, Speed Scrabble (although Wikipedia calls it “Take Two”).
Marie — all of your objections are certainly valid, although the article I read tried to address several of them through bits and pieces from other studies. IQ tests in general are so beset with irrelevancies and inadequacies. the main thing i take away from this is related to what we were discussing after my bragging post — how kids need to not hear from their parents that one child is the smart one, one the reliable one, one the dancer, one the artist. rather, somehow we need to parent each kid in such a way that he/she is able to reach his/her full potential unhindered by our labelling/restricting them in anyway. well, some labels are ok (like “daughter” and “son”)
is there a homeschool co-op near you? i am so interested in the st pete one that Gladis is a part of. still on the fence on this issue, but impressed by people (“normal” people — you know what i mean, i hope) who are committed to it.
Adrianne (or is this really Mike?) — if you’re seriously worried about this, you can check out Marie’s deconstruction of the study (her blog is Sunshine in a Bag on my blogroll).
Marcy — so yes, i completely had a hard time being the first
. you can thank me later for taking the heat from mom and dad. of course, the real mellowing occurs with the grandchildren.
the thing that upsets/concerns me most about the virginity thing is the expectations in our culture generally surrounding it (and attitudes towards fidelity). i wish it were expected that people, male and female, should/could/would remain virgins until married. of course we make mistakes; we make bad choices. but i think that extramarital sex should be considered a bad choice, rather than just a rite of passage or just something that happens when you get bored with your spouse.
big confession — i enjoy movies and books in which premarital sex is glamorized (but i generally can’t stand adultery movies). i know i should probably avoid such entertainment if i feel so strongly, but somehow have not been able to reconcile this…
oh, and i think it’s “successive”
Gladis — way to go! i probably had it much easier, as most of my friends were as sheltered as i was.
I remember some of my book club buddies loving The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants when it came out. I felt guilty for reading it. It definitely had sex as rite of passage as a given. By the 3rd (or was it 4th?) book I was thoroughly disgusted that there were teenagers out there being influenced by it, as well as being horrified that the book was a mirror of society.
And yes, I know the question that comes to mind is why did I read the sequels???? Good question…
I believe that moral cleanliness is a commandment from God and that he wants everyone to live it – but I know not everyone believes the same as I do and I don’t expect people to live by something they don’t believe in. Most of the world doesn’t believe in abstinence and I think that is becoming a major problem in many societies, with a variety of consequences, both personal and societal. I just hope that even those who don’t recognize abstinence and fidelity as a commandment still recognize the significance and repercussions of being sexually active and are responsible about their choices. I have read all of the Sisterhood books and I thought they dealt with sex in a realistic way. I plan to raise my children in a religious environment and to teach them to wait until marriage, but, without the gospel, I can see myself behaving in a similar manner to the characters in this series. They are not jumping into bed with every guy, and when the first girl does lose her virginity, it is not treated lightly and they clearly show that she was not ready for this serious step yet. Even the character with a steady boyfriend waits years before having sex with him, then still doesn’t feel ready for it. I hope that all teenagers nowadays have someone to talk to them about these issues, and what a big deal they are – but unfortunately most adults in our society don’t treat sex this way themselves and set a bad example for their kids.
Tara,
Thanks. I forgot that I did appreciate that B’s first s*xual encounter made her feel too vulnerable and like you said, was too soon. I’d forgotten that. We in my book club decided that we would let our mature teenage daughters read such a book–if we have control over what they read…
Lena in the last book was a big disappointment to me. She didn’t even love the man she slept with. In literature and movies, like Shannon, I can overlook promiscuity but only ONLY if they actually love each other. And adultery never in movies–and my one exception for literature is Atlas Shrugged. We watched The Last Kiss edited and it gave me such a sick feeling–well, they weren’t even married, but the couple was expecting their first child.
Marcy
hmmm, i don’t think i enjoy promiscuity in movies or literature. promiscuity indicates lack of discrimination and a degree of casualness and desire for multiple partners (i looked up promiscuous in dictionary.com if you’re interested) that is not appealing to me, whereas, sexual intimacy between two people whom the author or director has convinced me have strong feelings towards each other and a promise of a future can be very entertaining.
it’s an interesting point that Tara brings up — many people may not subscribe to a belief system that includes virginity and/or fidelity. what is more interesting to me, since we live in a democratic society in which we respect the freedom of religion, is the moral or contractual expectations of that society. I would guess that relatively the same number of people would identify themselves as Christians (and Jews and Muslims, etc) now as did 60 years ago, and yet, I think that the expectations in regard to sexual virtue have changed drastically. perhaps the actual behavior of men (and women) has not changed, but our reaction to that behavior, i think, has. and that troubles me. perhaps this indicates a lessening of hypocrisy or denial, but i think that we should have high standards regardless of how hard it is for anyone to live up to them.
if we as a society are expected to contribute to the maintenance of unwed mothers and for research into STDs, etc, then morality is not just a religious concern, but a societal one. of course everyone is free to act according to the dictates of their own conscience. but who should bear the cost of the consequences?
Thank you for the correction. Promiscuity was obviously not what I meant to say. You know what I mean.
I just hate it when I make mistakes like that. On a public blog. Oh well, it shouldn’t keep me from commenting, right?
Marcy — i think in strict theological cultures (including Mormon Utah), the word promiscuous is often used incorrectly (semantically speaking; perhaps morally it is just a matter of degree) in the way that you used it. so i would say that your use of the word was a cultural artifact, though i do think it is important to know what (and re-look at — which is why i looked it up in the dictionary rather than just going with my gut feeling) words mean to the wider population.
Gotcha.
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